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Highdeas: Crypto Weed is Here and Lame As Ever

Let’s start off with a well-known fact; NFTs are a total scam and blockchains are harmful to our environment. “Digital Art” and the AI-generated monkeys that crypto bros flaunt as a status of wealth, also known as NFTs, have lost their hype and overall value since its introduction 5 years ago. They’re the offspring of ponzi schemes, and I’ve not only been a part of one, but I’m also from the crypto capital of the US; Miami, Florida. I’ve had friends enter that industry with thousands of dollars invested, and were left with less than nothing. I've been scammed myself, so I can sniff out a scam from a mile away. And now, a new cancer has risen from the ashes of crypto-Hell, a concept that would make Satan cringe hard enough to create a 9th Circle specifically made for whomever came up with this vile idea. I speak, of course, of crypto weed.



Dr. Green (totally not a rip-off of Dr. Greenthumb) is an app owned by a billionaire from the UK named Maximillian White, and he considers himself the “Elon Musk of Weed.” He is 43 years old with an Instagram handle titled @theboyyouhate (the boy you hate). He’s a venture capitalist based in Dubai, owns the largest European distributor of medical marijuana, and has now created a service where he will sell users “digital keys” that are used to access the app’s global weed marketplace. These keys contain tools and the “necessary information” to manage your own cannabis business. White believes that by creating this app, joining the weed industry would cost a fraction of the price compared to now, while allowing the global sale of weed if Europe ends up legalizing the plant.


White himself said there would only be about 5,000 keys made available on Dr. Green, so just because you’re an avid user and consumer, there’s a chance you might not end up with a key at all. He also said the cost of a key is worth upwards to thousands of dollars, though there isn’t a set price (yet).



In case you still don’t understand how this app works, allow me to give you a basic rundown. I know how this app works because a few years ago I joined a service called VeVe, which was the same bullshit scam that Dr. Green is. What happens is once you create an account on the app, you’ll have to buy “tokens” that are used to join different NFT auctions. In Dr. Green’s case, the “planets” are the different auctions. They’re set at specific times for everyone to join, set at a certain price to join, and it works like a raffle—the NFT you end up with (if you win) is picked randomly from the blockchain. Each NFT has their own monetary value and includes “perks” (though it is still unclear what they are on Dr. Green). If you win in the auction, you can choose to keep the NFT and see if it rises in value over time, or immediately sell it to another user in the app for less than what you bought it for. If you don’t win an NFT in the auction, better luck next time. No refunds, either.


I joined VeVe a few years ago because the idea was new to me and sounded like a fun thing to invest in in case whatever I won was valuable. Crypto was big at the time in Miami (2021), and I had already missed out on the Bitcoin wave. The auctions I joined on VeVe sold digital comic books that held a monetary value (US currency) depending on what issue you won, they were readable, and were supposedly licensed by Marvel.


The digital comic book I ended up winning is worth less today than what I paid for, and is worth less than the actual physical copy. I joined one auction, won a not-so-rare issue of Spiderman, and I never won another NFT again (after paying to be part of multiple auctions, of course). VeVe’s biggest trick was how the tokens you buy in the app to access the NFTs cannot be converted back to US currency. It kind of worked like Bovada, the sports-betting app, where you can transfer money from your bank account to the app in order to place bets, but you cannot transfer your winnings from the app back into your account—you need to download and join a 3rd party app. However, there was no 3rd party banking app for VeVe, so if you poured thousands of US dollars in the app and exchanged them for their tokens, you were stuck with those tokens. And those tokens are worth nothing in US dollars.


I eventually realized I lost out on about 50 bucks and nipped those losses in the bud. I deleted the app, and was glad I didn’t put more money into it. Can’t say the same for the guy who got me into VeVe in the first place, as he invested over $200k into his VeVe account, only to end up going on Instagram and asking his followers to buy the account from him (which he priced at $150k).


That’s how a scam works, and that’s what will happen if you invest in Dr. Green. The app is a cash grab by selling AI-generated art that holds zero monetary value, even in its own services. It’s already backed by millions of dollars and is run by a billionaire that nobody in the weed industry has ever heard of. It’s already been endorsed by multiple rappers and influencers on social media—people who are notorious for grifting their fans and followers. I think the funniest celebrity collab Dr. Green has is with Lil Pump, the scamming rapper known for jumping on different grifts like Solana, the right-wing MAGA party, and pump-and-dump NFT scams (pun intended).


This Maximillian White guy is a total chode, too. A venture capitalist based in Dubai who recently joined the weed industry for its profits doesn’t belong in the cannabis space. A guy like White doesn’t give a fuck about the quality of weed. He’s just another Kim Rivers, another MedMen, a billionaire flexer trying to cash in on the weed industry. There’s already enough of that. These types of people think solely about profits and quantity, and not about accessibility and quality. If he cared about accessibility, he wouldn't be charging you thousands of dollars for his "digital key."


Crypto bros shouldn’t get involved with weed, anyways. That’d be mixing two of some of the most annoying personalities into one entity. Like, imagine if Sal from Pineapple Express were your weed dealer, and he started yapping about crypto and NFTs. You’d have to strangle his neck for him to shut the fuck up.



That’s who Maximillian White is, except with a bunch of money. Just read what he thinks of his own weed company, one you’ve never heard of:


“Now what I’ve done is, I’ve managed to put myself years and years ahead of everyone else. Why? Because of the quality, I’ve always had the capability of growing the best quality.”


“…I’ve got patents on growing systems that are the best in the world. Used by the best in the world for the best. I’ve always had them anyway. That’s why I made my money in the earlier years.”


“…What we’ve done is, we’ve got the best quality and we’ve got the capability of you being able to get everything from under one roof. So you don’t have to mess around and go round to 60, 70 different companies to try and fulfil a small order, you can get it from one stock.”


Again, a trust fund baby trying to make a quick buck by selling AI-art and wholesale mids is not what anyone asked for. I’ve never heard of Maximillian White, his weed, nor his company prior to this Dr. Green grift. Neither have you, and there’s a reason for that. Dan Bilzerian already tried and failed to become what White is reaching for. Don’t let his ponzi scheme fool you into thinking it’s the future of weed. It’s not.


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